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Thursday, April 18, 2002 From the Shadow of the Past Tonight Ryan made a comment that really made me think. She (yes, Ryan is a girl) said that I have a lot of charisma... which is funny to me, especially considering that I don't usually feel very charismatic. Strange... when I was in elementary school I was one of the least liked kids in my class--when we'd pick partners in gym I was always left by the wayside and stuck with the other "rejected" girl, whom I didn't get along with. Things have gotten better over the years, but I've never been part of the "in" crowd; I was the girl who had a hard time finding someone to go to formals with, who often seemed on to be the outside looking in. I still feel that way sometimes, wondering whether I really fit in or if people are just tolerating my presence. Granted, those thoughts occur less now--people seem to like me more than they used to--but sometimes the little voice in my head whispers that those around me are just wishing I'd go away. Have I changed that much over the years? ^ Top | 1:10 AM | | | 
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